Our Friend Has Died

Our Friend Has Died

Any loss is upsetting. Some losses are insupportable. Our friend’s death has occasioned a look at our memories.

For now, we remember our friend: the cheery encouragement to continue; the gentle and affectionate conversations; the thoughtful gifts; the trouble taken to remember significant days; the thank you letters; the little notes accompanying surprises (“I thought that this might interest you”); for such was Our Friend.

Then we recall exhortations, gentle and kind: “Call in on your way and we’ll have something together”; “do come and see the garden, it looks so pretty just now”; “have a read of this”; “I hope you have time to listen to this”; “I’m sending this for you to try”; for such was Our Friend.

Further, we remind ourselves of the telephone conversation starter: “Now I’m not disturbing you, am I?” For such was Our Friend. (When email became the norm and we were at a loss as to how to start one, he suggested “Hello” and it works extremely well).

Not only friend to us; but also friend and keeper and carer to many others. Teacher by example always; the theory made manifest. Selfless.

We are all sorry to see you no more. We are pleased that your sleep, when it came, was just that, gentle and unnoticed; we did love you.

The closing line of our conversations was always “Now, we’ll be in touch again, soon”; “We certainly will”.

And We Certainly Will; for Such was our friend. In the meantime, we remember.

Particularly we shall remember with bread; for our friend shared his bread with us, memorably.

That is the sign.

We also remember it was summer; it was June; it was sunny; remember; remember.



2 thoughts on “Our Friend Has Died

    1. You are so very kind. I was once deeply moved by somebody writing to me – after the death of a family member – that “the knowledge and love of those that we treasured so dearly lives on in our hearts and we never really lose them”. I believe and hold this to be true and I look daily for all signs – and I know that they are there for I also have it on good authority.

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